I don't want to be the first to say good-bye

[wilsonhutchison04]

I've been married for almost 3 years and I knew that my husband had a thug side. But he promised me a lot and he has tried to make good on those, but he hurt me so bad along the way that I have a hard time being with him. I know that I love hime with all my heart and soul, but he just doesn't get it when I tell him that I'm still hurt by some of the things that he did to me.
I have never caught him cheating but he would come home with his boxers on backwards, female hair tangled in his (and it wasn't my color and he hadn't been home for 2 days) he's done a lot of bad. But I chose to stay with him.
But now he is actually trying to do the right thing and I don't know if I can ever truly forgive him for all that he's done.
Lately all we do is argue and I don't want my children to see that. Has anyone out there ever been in a situation like this? If so, please let me know how you handled it. Any advice will be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

[TheLoveDoctor]

What is it that you two still seem to be fighting over? Do you still suspect he is cheating on you>

[fnlaughs]

yes, I have been there. Two broken noses...etc...cheating... once a cheater always a cheater...and god help you if he's military... never gonna change. I'll share more...privately though... depending on where you live...I do work in that line of business...and there is a great phone you can get now...where you can hear everything upto 35 feet of the phone..and see all ims...and another one... alittle more expensive...you can listen into all conversations... let me know in a private comment... and I have children so I completely understand.

[tongyun]

I've never been in a situation like yours but when I was younger I used to hear the horrible fights that my parents had, so I admire you for trying to keep what's happening with your husband separate from your kids. I hope I'm not being rude here, but I think you need to seek the help of a counselor to give you some strength to make the right decision. I wouldn't even bring up the subject with hubby at this moment, but do it for yourself so you can be emotionally strong and healthy. Best of luck to you.