Were My Expectations Too High?

Kayla Bear

Starting from the beginning, in 7th grade I moved to a new school, and had made a few new friends, but there was one girl that really stuck out, but I was too afraid to talk to. She seemed to have an obcession for Green Day much as I did, so I knew we had that major thing in common, but again, I was too shy.

Eventually one of my friends introduced us and we quickly became best friends. She was absolutely my best friend in the world... we did lots of fun stuff together, like going to see the midnight showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and seeing the Green Day concert when they came to town, and she had even invited me to go to Las Vegas with her and her mom just a few weeks later to go see them again! unfortunately my mom wouldnt let me.

Before we knew it, high school was upon us and we had to go to seperate schools... we were both very sad, but knew that we would stay really good friends. Freshman year, we still called each other now and then and would sometimes hang out... much less than before, but I was just glad that we were still in contact.

That year, I met my current boyfriend and began sometimes sacrificing some of "Megan"'s time to spend it with him. A few months later, I told her of happy news... he had proposed to me, though later we decided it'd be better as just a promise ring, and that someday we would get married. She just gave me a look of disgust and disapproval and said that I was stupid for ever doing such a thing, and that I was too young to even be thinking about that.

We hadn't talked since then, at least not that I remember. A few months ago, I stumbled upon her MySpace and her AIM s/n... so I decided to try to talk to her. She told me that she really didn't want to talk, and that maybe we should talk some other time. After some verbal manipulation, I found out that she was drunk... When I knew her, she wouldn't even drink a whole wine cooler. I apologized for having not talked to her in such a long time and that sort of thing.

A few weeks later, I IM'ed her again, and again she told me that it wasn't a good time.... again, because she was horribly drunk. She confessed that she lost her virginity a few months ago, and that she'd been with 9 guys already, and that she was cheating on her boyfriend. When I knew her, she swore up and down that she would never ever have sex with anyone before she was married... she had never done anything more than a simple peck-like kiss with a guy.

When I came upon her MySpace, I immediately added her as a friend, after nearly a month, she accepted. From that point on, I have suggested, asked, even begged to hang out with her... she always seems to have an excuse,... or sometimes no response at all.

I had always "known" that we'd be friends forever, and that we'd be each other's maid of honor in our weddings, and that our kids would play together, and she would be my lifetime best friend. Ever since I've been in contact with her, she just dissapoints me and makes me depressed. I'd still love to be her friend, but I'm just about giving up. Any advice?

TheLoveDoctor

Be a friend to her and don't completely shut her out. But people change. You've already tried to initiate something with her, but you have your own life and your own friends. Be open to her coming back around to you, but it seems you've done almost all you can do.