Trust violation in a relationship is real. It can happen in many ways, and the harm it causes could be devastating. Adultery, lying, lack of affection, or any form of betrayal can make a couple not know what to do with the relationship’s future. 

But there is always a chance for the restoration of trust in a relationship and therapy certainly has a major part to play in this. In this article, we are going to learn how therapy may be beneficial for couples healing after the trauma of trusting a partner who betrayed that trust.

Providing a safe space for expression

When there is a case of infidelity or any other form of betrayal, both individuals are likely to experience an emotional open season. This makes it overwhelming to find a way of handling the situation.

Couples counseling Westchester NY provides a platform for each couple to share feelings and issues with no possibility of aggression. Such freedom of expression is important especially when trust is being rebuilt, and that can only be possible if there is a third party present.

Assisting the couples to understand each other

Jealousy causes people to become defensive and close-minded. This may be a result of betrayal that results in misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Oftentimes a therapist will assist the couple in active listening and by getting each partner to see things from the other’s point of view. When working on the communication couples also work on how to deal with the conflict after betrayal and the steps of rebuilding the trust.

Tackling the symptoms: recognizing the root causes

Sometimes, the betrayal may stem from other issues within the relationship, for example, conflicts and or unfulfilled emotional needs. A therapist can assist couples in identifying these root problems. As a result the couple can find ways to resolve them. 

With this knowledge, both parties in a relationship can start afresh and try to mend the damages. This can build up a new and healthy relationship rhythm.

Providing communication management strategies

Trust in one another is one of the key ingredients that define any relationship. Thus, couples must embrace good communication practices in the process of rebuilding the broken relationship. A therapist can educate couples on the way to approach each other.

Listening instead of reacting angrily to the other’s opinion is one of the best communication strategies. Therapy also allows couples to work on aspects of communication and replace disagreeable patterns with favorable ones. Once the partners learn how to communicate their expectations and emotions appropriately, there is a chance to rebuild trust.

Building empathy

A therapist assists each partner in developing empathy for the other’s emotions to promote understanding and connection. Empathy is the capacity to place oneself in another person’s position and experience their emotions. Healing from infidelity requires empathy because it enables both parties to:

• Take ownership of their behaviors and accept accountability for them.
• Express regret and an honest apology for the hurt and suffering the affair caused.
• Recognize each other’s strengths and shortcomings and show understanding for one another. 

By doing so, the couple can transition from a place of blame and animosity to one of forgiveness and compassion.

Fostering transparency

Betrayal may lead to trust issues and emotional distress. The betrayed partner may experience hurt and betrayal which leads to emotions of insecurity. Couples therapy promotes openness to rebuild trust. This could entail willingly disclosing details about everyday plans, communications, and actions. This is necessary to foster an atmosphere of transparency and comfort for the deceived spouse.

Improving emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence is assessed as the capacity to acknowledge feelings within oneself and in others and use this information in interacting with other people. Each partner should learn how to manage feelings. This is one of the goals a therapist can set with a couple. 

It entails identifying indications that one is angry, hurt, or sad and responding to these signs in a positive manner. Couples must start to learn how to regulate their emotions effectively, without anger and argument, so they can slowly mend the broken trust and try to feel each other again.

Owning affection and emotional bonding

Betrayal leads to the development of an emotional space between the partners through which any attempt at trust-building becomes very hard. A couples counselor can assist couples to regain physical and emotional closeness. This is by providing them with information on how they can discuss their feeling, goals, and fears. It is very important for couples to develop a safe environment for the expression of emotions, which will enhance safe intimacy.

Establishing relationship goals

For couples to rebuild trust, they have to have a plan of where they want their relationship to be in the future. Therapists assist couples by introducing them to their individual and mutual motives, principles, and expectations towards the relationship. In this way, they can make a common plan for the future and regain confidence, which is very important for a couple’s life.

New directions for meeting individual needs

Trust repair also entails changes on the side of the betrayer and the receiver of betrayal. It also calls for a therapist to point out growth areas for both partners, which may include self-awareness, regulation of emotions, or assertion. The idea of working on self improvement means that every partner can help to create an emotionally healthier environment for both while regaining trust.

Summing up

Infidelity is one of the most painful experiences in a relationship. However, people can work through it in therapy and restore trust. Therapy plays the necessary roles in a couple’s relationship reconstruction after betrayal: 

• It creates a safe environment for the couple
• It teaches partners how to understand each other
• It reveals hidden issues and conflicts
• It builds effective communication
• It builds empathy
• It encourages transparency
• It enhances emotional intelligence
• It develops intimacy
• It creates shared goals about the future
• It works on individual needs. 

The process can sometimes feel arduous, but being able to establish a more trustful and supportive relationship with your partner is always a great feeling.